This is not an essay. A few days ago, Kenyan novelist, Wainaina Binyavanga, tweeted a set of remarks he called “a brief scientific history of deamons.”  Aaron Bady of New Inquiry compiled and edited them into what you have here.

I can’t honestly say what this is. Really. You just have to read and make of it what you will. Looks like Binyavanga was possessed by Marechera’s spirit or something. The most I can say is that when storytelling tips over the edge of prophecy, you get this.

#BrazeYourself

Ivan Forde

So the deamon for homosexuality, is it French? Coz many Pentecostals say it is not African. Now, the deamon of homosexuality—I’m thinking it came on a ship, coz deamons must be hosted by a body. They just can’t arrive by teleporting. Bible Scientists who know the field very well have deeply researched ALL African knowledge and are sure Gay deamon DID indeed come from the West. Scientists and experts on Bible Africa are sure Homo deamon was imported. I’m not sure though whether by plane or ship. Container number? Homosexuality deamon could very well have arrived, not in a container (carrying Friesian bulls maybe?), it could have come with passengers. Homosexuality deamon must have sat around bored for a long long time occupying one or two people, until the internet arrived.

When the internet arrived, the homosexuality deamon went digital, and was able to climb into optic fibers. Homosexuality deamon learns fast. Full of trickery. Read a lot and decided to convert from simple analogue deamonhood, to an actual ideology. Homosexuality demon is by this time quite African, a middle class one, likes old colonial houses, comfy hotels, really likes imported things. Homosexuality deamon decided to occupy son of a pastor to a scholarship in the Netherlands where they ate cheese, wore clogs and smoked bang. While smoking bhang and at tenting philosophy they came up with a Homosexual ideology. They called it Gayism and Lesbianism. Homosexuality deamon and son of Pastor knew that Africans would never accept them unless they were imported and western. So they bought skinny jeans and balanced trousers.

Flight back to Nairobi (first class with NGO money), they were attacked overflying Sudan, by a chariot of male African homosexuality deamons. It was very traumatising – a bunch of Wolof speakers afro-deamons, some Azande, some refused to say. Two Kings. Shaka and Kabaka Mwanga. So. they were hijacked and taken to a hotel in Entebbe. They were taught many things, secret Baganda things, warrior-like Zulu things. Kabaka Mwanga said he really liked young boys, pages. He liked girls too. Actually he liked a feast of flesh.

So, deamon of Homosexuality (French mum, English dad) and Pastor’s Son were very well educated. Shaka, they learned was into pain: thorns, shot spear stabs, soulful war cries. He taught them geopolitics and how to shield their websites. Shaka was not into women. Hated lesbians. Kabaka mwanga hated white people, kept trying to poison Imported Homosexual deamon. He really hated Catholic priests. They killed his lovers. The things they did in the Cathedral!Over two weeks in Entebbe, they used social media to spread Afro-homosexualism everywhere with a few dutch techniques.

Meanwhile Museveni and Martin Ssempa really wanted to make some contacts with some crazy Bush type southern baptist ex- slave owning types. And so they had lunch with some Pentacostals who showed them the famous poo poo videos. Museveni was a soldier, and soldiers know what these things are about. man -man love has always been part of man-man war. But Ssempa was sssstunned. sweaty, hot, most and tender, angry. Sssso..that night King Shaka and Kabaka Mwanga visited him in his room and showed him the Cow Formation Sssstrategy – he has not recovered. Pastor’s son/Homsexual deamon built a cottage together in Azandeland where they took care of the four lost Kings who really caused mischief. Aaall over Africa. So, Homosexuality deamon taught pastor’s son that there are all kinds of deamons. Pentacostal bullshit deamons. Pentacostal kinda ok deamons.

And that is a brief scientific history of deamons via Pentecos-magination. Next week, in Pentacostal Bible Study, we will talk about evolution. And why Adam is shit scared of Eve.

 

The awesome image in the post is by Ivan Forde. See more Ivan’s work HERE.

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I hold a doctorate in English from Duke University and recently joined the Marquette University English faculty as an Assistant Professor. I love teaching African fiction and contemporary British novels. Brittle Paper is the virtual space/station where I play and experiment with ideas on how to reinvent African fiction and literary culture.

5 Responses to ““African Homosexual Deamon” — Binyavanga’s Brief Treatise On Demonology” Subscribe

  1. Fufeyin 2014/02/01 at 05:26 #

    Declaring homosexuality a norm is sure about being imported to Africa. Not homosexuality and homosexual tendencies themselves that are ubiquitous and as old as man and an underground business. I’m curious which answer Mr Francois Hollande w’d have preferred: to be born of two men/two women or a man and wife. Great aberrations in waiting for the coming generations! And the confusion, extreme hollowness, antipathy and ‘animality’ that must follow. Africa should have been left alone. As much as pedophilia is ‘hated’ now, one can hazard pedophilia will soon be legalized when the West realizes their forebears had no qualms indulging in it at sometime in ancient Greece, and the wholesale sharing of wives where they still exist at all as was in dying Rome. Such are what marks without fail civilizations that have done their term. Such are grave lessons but we go no further than seeing what happened as entertainment.

  2. Mbulela 2014/04/19 at 12:40 #

    Binyavanga talks a load of crap most of the time. So nothing surprises me. He seems keen on being known as the gay writer rather than the good or even great fiction writer. I am not interested in where he sticks his willy into, he should just concentrate in writing good fiction (assuming he can).

Trackbacks/Pingbacks

  1. “When the internet arrived, the homosexuality deamon went digital” - 2014/04/14

    […] Binyavanga Wainaina on the scientific history of African deamons […]

  2. “African Homosexual Deamon” — Binyavanga’s Brief Treatise On Demonology | Brittle Paper | [Modern Times] - 2015/01/02

    […] via “African Homosexual Deamon” — Binyavanga’s Brief Treatise On Demonology | Brittle Paper. […]

  3. Binyawanga Wainaina as a Queer Prophet | Adriaan van Klinken - 2015/11/25

    […] 2014. These tweets have been compiled and edited into a singular piece of text with the title “African Homosexual Deamon”, published on the weblog BrittlePaper. This series of twenty-one tweets opens with the question: […]

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I hold a doctorate in English from Duke University and recently joined the Marquette University English faculty as an Assistant Professor. I love teaching African fiction and contemporary British novels. Brittle Paper is the virtual space/station where I play and experiment with ideas on how to reinvent African fiction and literary culture.

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