You are not yet a true literati until you know how to demean your enemies in well-crafted literary insults. What are literary insults?

The definition is tricky but I’ll try.

You know you’ve received a literary insult when instead of being pissed off, you find yourself impressed at the sheer brilliance of the offender’s diction, word play, imagery — their verbal virtuoso.

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Crafting literary insults is a rare skill but only because people never take the time out to learn how to do it. It’s actually quite easy.

Check out these examples we found at guardian.com. Use them as a template and start assembling an arsenal of literary insults for your next cocktail party.

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Bridget Jones’ Diary by Helen Fielding. Photograph: Ronald Grant

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Small Gods by Terry Pratchett. Photograph: UK Celebrity/Alamy

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Crime and Punishment by Fyodor Dostoevsky. Photograph: Bettmann/Corbis

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Timequake by Kurt Vonnegut. Photograph: Everett Collection/Rex Features

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Murder on the Orient Express by Agatha Christie. Photograph: Sportsphoto Ltd./Allstar

Click on to guardian.com for more! HERE.