This recipe makes one hearty serving of homemade linguini pasta with a delicious sauce of your choice. Double or triple the amounts to serve more people. It also doesn’t include eggs or require a pasta machine. Oh, and it’s addictive. You’ve been warned.

 

Ingredients:

For the pasta:

– Semolina flour
– Water
– Salt

For the sauce:

– Tomatoes
– Onions
– Cooking oil
– Soy sauce
– Salt to taste

Optional:

– Minced meat of your choice
– Higher-than-average stress levels of your choice – because you’ll sleep like a stone after eating this dish.

 

Utensils:

– A bed
– A fridge
– A kitchen scale
– A roll of cling film or a plastic bag
– A frying pan
– A saucepan
– A rolling pin
– A flat surface
– A pizza cutter or knife
– A platter

 

Instructions

1. Make your bed. Trust me, the drowsiness, which is perfectly normal, will kick in when you’re about three bites into this meal. It’s called a food coma, like feeling sleepy after eating ugali, or any food rich in carbs. With fresh, homemade pasta, this coma is sweet. You’ll want a ready bed after it.
2. Think about what’s stressing you at this time. You’ll have the chance to take it out on the pasta as you roll it out.
3. Using your kitchen scale, measure out 5 parts semolina flour to 3 parts water into a mixing bowl. A hearty serving for one comprises 100 grams flour and 60 grams water.
4. Add a pinch of salt and mix them all together using a spoon or spatula. The dough should be soft but not sticky.
5. Place the dough mixture in a piece of cling film or plastic bag.
6. Keep the dough in the fridge for at least 30 minutes.
7. Start on the sauce while the dough rests in the fridge.
8. Chop the vegetables and cook them in a frying pan, along with the soy sauce. Add salt to taste. The sauce should be thick, not runny, to coat the pasta. Chef’s note: Personally, I use minced soy (Sossi brand) whenever I can, but you can use any type of minced meat for your sauce.
9. Once the sauce is ready, set it aside. You can reheat it a little when the pasta is ready to serve.
10. Remove the pasta dough from the fridge. Cut it into three or four pieces, and put them back into the cling film or plastic bag. This prevents the dough from drying out.
11. Use semolina flour to dust your flat surface and the first piece of dough. Be generous, otherwise the dough will stick while you roll it out.
12. Roll out each piece into 2mm thickness. Use a pizza cutter or knife to cut long strips from the dough. The strips don’t need to be perfect. Chef’s note: You are making linguini pasta, and yes, this is where you relieve your stress. This works wonders on a Sunday afternoon, when I have a difficult week behind me and a new one just beginning. A little elbow grease heals my soul.
13. Place the strips on a floured platter. Space them out so they won’t stick together.
14. Bring a pot of water to a boil. Add the strips of pasta and stir gently. Chef’s note: Fresh pasta cooks very fast, so turn the heat to low after one minute and check for doneness. The pasta should be al dente: firm and chewy, but not falling apart.
15. Drain the pasta and serve onto a plate. Pour your sauce over the pasta and mix. The sauce should coat each piece of pasta evenly.
16. Dig in.
17. Yawn after three bites.
18. Slouch in your seat after five bites.
19. Finish your pasta dish, place the empty plate in the sink, and go to bed.
20. Thank me later.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Photo by Yoav Aziz on Unsplash