i.
in the name of Allah
i begin this poem by pronouncing the beautiful names of my Lord
as-Samii’u and al-Mujeebu, i am here this night
i am here with my grave desires, Ya Waliyyu
listen to me, Ya Samii’u
answer all my prayers, Ya Mujeebu
for you are the exalted, Ya Qadiru

ii.
i’ve had a lot of pain in the past
my heart was burnt by delusion
i’ve had enough shortcomings for good deeds
i have stayed away from anything that reminds of you

iii.
it has been a year of undulating suffering
& subsequent tears always come with explosives
my face has lost its freshness to corroding

iv.
i am now an orchard of misery
whose fruits wallow in melancholy
i am full of indelible scars

v.
Ya Hayyu Ya Qayyum, my heart is burning again
let this pain pass over me gently like water
let it roll and roll and roll over my back like rock
let me re-taste the aroma of a morning smile
Ya Muyassiru, don’t let this pain break my body;
let me bear the dignity of a smiling heart

vi.
Ya Mudabbiru, i want to be re-established again
i want to have a son that i will call mine
i have an immortal longing to marry Amina
yet she is under pressure to leave me soon
exchange this destiny, Ya Musawwiru, for me
get us married and have our Khalid together

vii.
she would be leaving me if You
didn’t re-work this very fate, Ya ‘Adlu
my heart is burning from her love
i am already ablaze, Ya ‘Ali
offer me a drizzle
water the raging fire in my body
distance me away from this fire, Ya Qawiyyu
on this note, i break into a halt
hoping to open my eyes while mouthing, Alhamdulil Lah

 

 

As-Samii’u: the all-hearing
Al-Mujeebu: the answerer of prayers
Al-Waliyyu: the true protector
Al-Qadir: the most powerful
Ya Hayyu Ya Qayyum: the sustainer and the self-subsisting
Al-Muyassir: the One who makes things easier
Al-Mudabbiru: the One Who manages everything
Al-Musawwir: the fashioner
Al-Adlu: the just
Al-Ali: the most high
Al-Qawiyyu: the most powerful
Alhamdulil Lah: all praises due to Allah.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Photo by ayumi kubo on Unsplash